Posted By
Luca
on 2008-03-29
10:18:14
 |  Re: New C16 Plus 4 Website
[...written before Lando's last post]
Ok, some days passed, and now I feel I'm calm enough to write something, though this post will cover 30% of all the babbling I could spit out in order to easily rebut all the crap written till now.
Lando's steaming is something totally unexpected, unexplainable, indefensible, coarse.
At first sight, I blamed myself because of my bad Messiah-ish attitudes, oooh I'd been so much unfair, oooh it's my fault. Now I'm able to see the truth: "oooh I'm guilty" what the heck? It's a mere moaning likely story! The truth is that no one has the power to become someone else's pretext to stop hobbies and passions, avoiding to take it upon himself!
Lando, for the nth time: I'm absolutely bewildered about your "steaming", I was so proud you've appreciated, for example, my addon about ACE's story...and now this crap. I didn't suspect all this resentfulness into you, I invite you to restore anything you think I changed. This site exists, as you pointed out, because of the cooperation between you and Csabo. Nonetheless, this doesn't contravene the option to consider growing up, moderate your words, bevel your opinions and/or recover your mental health.
And now, Lavina.
Lavina, first of all, sorry for my lacking of answers both here and on ICQ, this thread has been a very sad surprise, under several aspects, and I simply pressed the CANCEL icon for any message, from you and from many others, simply because I got astonished for days.
I really appreciated your attempt to take peace into this pile of shit, but I guess you didn't used the best words to succeed in that, as other guys pointed out too. Moreover, the vision of a scene like a distant paradise of youth pulses, where to play your childish acts, might be "one personal view" of the scene, but surely not the most common, in this and other scenes. But I'll reprise this argument at the end.
The rest I'm gonna tell to you is only a mere offtopic remarks.
The so-called "Plus/4 PC era" (the Messiah has to come back, sorry!) has been started by me, when I decided (1994/95) to enrich the Delta System stuff repository on rulez.org in order to upgrade it to a real Plus/4 archive, with great help from TLC, Lion and SJP, building up my X1541 cable (which miraculously I used till now on XP!). After an year or so, in 1996, I released On The Net docs, coz'the archive was big enough, if my memory hasn't gone totally off. For a lamer it would mean a good thing, no?  Moreover, I'm the same lamer whom you asked for a SID music (and I did it with the horrible Future Composer on Plus/4) for your...erm...vapourware strategic game "Khaios"
It seems I'm the busiest lamer ever.
What does it mean? Maybe does it mean I was the weirdo clown in 4ever03 party? Now I can understand a certain "kidding aura" around me at Szeged's...
Lavina, please forgive me for my silence and keep up your great work, it has been a hard blow to me, try to understand how I felt.
Final part: changes happen.
Combining both Lando's and Lavina's, something useful popped out.
First of all, my deep passion in this...mmm hobby? Dunno how to call it... My deep passion in this, which can be calculated in wasted hours on maaaaaany fronts, let the other sceners to have a wrong picture of me: a jollyhearted fanatic with so much free time to spend into. That's absolutely wrong, and the right vision is this: life steals time to me too, but I used to sacrifice much more time I should be able to spend, stealing it even from sleeping, when needed. Yeah, that's really childish now, sounds like "my passion is bigger than yours", but please appreciate the fact that it could surprisingly be true.
At the moment, I'm scene-overloaded: rulez.org is continuously refreshed, +4world has been raised to the max with an impressive effort (who wrotes all the news, entries, who does the pictures, who corrects "und" to "and" for the nth damn time?  ), coding has been started in a higher level (finally!), music and graphics, diskmag editing, other sites'mainatining, XeO3 project, contacts with the whole scene and with other scenes, pouet's threatenings and addons, and much much MUCH more! It's big fun...but it's BIG!
You do it all, you're proud, and one day a guy comes to tell you that you claimed to be the Plus/4 Messiah, bah! 
Hence, maybe I need a substitution in +4World's site maintaining. Did it write "maybe"? No, I meant: FOR SURE, hell!!
Another one: a pizzaeating fanatic scene clown may be acceptable, but it dopes the scene. After some flops into motivating the scene (Jazzmacx Plus/4, limiTED2 suggested, votes here and for a diskmag), after taking in count the incredible efforts spent in order to motivate ppl when organizing EVERYTHING (Lacoste's 2nd dvd, all the coopdemos...), I realized that: time has comes when the scene must save by himself. No more stupid mandolino's Messiah which suggest organize scream turn left turn right pray menace contact recontact recontact again and so on. If the scene will die, it will die, and the Plus/4 will be used rarely in very few wild compos as an exotic platform.
Moreover, I'm feeling like a fish out of the ball now, whatever the others told me about moving on and leave the shit behind my shoulders; right now, I'm slowly forcing myself to add news and stuff and new members and new groups and and and. All the messages about "moving on", though friendly and pretty nice, unfortunately have the only effect to upset me more. I would repeat it: Lando used heavy words against me, and Lavina has accidentally and indirectly underlined some real crack at the contact surface between me and """the scene""".
What does mean? It means we better need another +4world site maintainer because I drop, alternatively it would be kewl to have a co-maintainer in order to share the moanings about deleted pictures or other farts at 50% and decide with two heads about the site in general step by step.
Although the little sense of nausea, I'll slowly continue to maintain the site till we would find an useful solution, also because I know Csabo is pretty busy these weeks and can't be annoyed by all this crap.
Sincere greetings to Csabo Lando Lavina Degauss Csio Chronos and all the others, absolutely no grudge by me, because after few days I finally understood that all this has happened because of the bad scene's tradeoff, and not because of the single person's speech. The feeble scene's equilibrium finally has broken.
[...written after Lando's last post]
Oh my! The smilies! The smilies! Paulk easily caught the sense of my post, and you're still here puking malicious thoughts out?
Yeah, of course, ask Csabo to explain shit like "Luca was going to get upset, be one annoying mother, most ignorant and selfish all at the same time", probably I misunderstood that, 'coz you would say "gimme that slice of choccolate cake, please" Moreover, an ignorant Messiah sounds like an oxymoron.
Ok, we only have to wait for some decisions in order to see who's next which will deserve another distinct degree of pat on the back (as an info, I abitually use one level only, talking about pats on the back).
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